Chasing Ivy (Oak Hill, #1) Read online

  As soon as Dawson’s hand left my thigh and he exited the room, I jumped to my feet and had to cover my mouth before a girly squeal fell out of it. I was prepared to pretend like it hadn’t happened, just like we’d done earlier in the day, but he told me he didn’t regret it.

  That meant he wanted to kiss me, right?

  That meant he wanted things to change, right?

  Doom washed over me like I’d just walked through an open waterfall. Things would change. Feelings that I’d buried deep within would surface and I would get even more attached to him. Dawson and I were the best of friends; we’d been that way since I was in seventh grade. I had enough memories of us to last a lifetime and the thought of adding in intimate memories, things like knowing what his mouth would feel like on mine…those would haunt me until the end of time if things didn’t work out between us.

  I’d watched enough movies and read enough books where two best friends fall in love and then things go wrong and then never return to how they once were. Sure, in the movies and books, the two characters always end up back together in the end, blissfully in love and happily married.

  But those were fictional. I might be young and naïve but I knew, for a fact, that reality didn’t play out like that. The guy doesn’t always get the girl in the end, and the girl doesn’t always end up with her happily-ever-after.

  Dawson and I could fall madly in love, he could take my virginity and I’d hang off his arm like I’d seen so many girls do at my school, but what would happen if things went in a different direction? What would happen if he got sick of me and wanted to be with another girl?

  I was totally out of my league compared to all the other girls Dawson has been with. I was a big, fat virgin! I had no idea how to have sex. I mean, okay, I had a little bit of an idea from what Becca and Casey had told me but I was more of a hands-on learner.

  Awkward.

  I honestly would be destroyed if something happened between us, causing our friendship to go up in flames. And, even if we did salvage our friendship, I would never be able to deal with him being with someone else, knowing that I hadn’t been good enough or that I hadn’t made him happy. Our friendship would be based on a lie. And then it would cease to be.

  Dawson and I would cease to be.

  Things were going to get complicated and messy and I could openly admit that I was scared to death for things to change. That was the last thing I remembered thinking about before I fell asleep with Charlie’s Angels playing in the background, curled up on Dawson’s bed.

  Now, the TV was on low and an infomercial was playing, advertising some super-amazing pan to cook eggs in. My legs were intertwined with Dawson’s and his muscled arm was laying heavily across my stomach.

  I’d taken my hoodie off after he’d left the room earlier because I was completely burning up (probably something to do with the way he’d looked at me and the way his hand had felt on my thigh), and my grey t-shirt had risen up a few inches…meaning that Dawson’s bare forearm was lying on my bare stomach.

  The wild fluttering that occurred in my lower stomach was almost embarrassing.

  Turning my head to the side, I took in his peaceful, sleeping face. He was so incredibly attractive in the simplest way.

  His tousled, shaggy cinnamon-colored hair was hanging off his forehead, covering his eyebrows. I giggled because he needed a haircut in the worst way, yet he still looked perfect. His long eyelashes, that most girls were probably jealous of, fluttered along his smooth cheeks. His straight nose led down to his unmoving, blush-colored lips. My eyes naturally zeroed in on them and I could feel my lower body start to feel funny in the way that I really, really wanted to kiss him.

  I felt my face getting warmer with each passing second that I studied his face like he was some fancy statue in the middle of a museum. I slowly turned my head away and took a deep breath. I let it out slowly, careful not to wake him up.

  I reached my other arm over and grabbed my phone from beside me.

  My eyes sprang wide open when I took in the time. How was it almost two in the morning?! How long were we sleeping and why didn’t he wake me up when he came back in here?

  Thankfully, my parents thought I was staying with Becca so I wasn’t missing curfew or anything. Heck, they probably wouldn’t even be mad if I told them I fell asleep with Dawson. They truly did love him. I wonder what they’d think if I told them that Dawson and I were becoming a thing. Were we? Maybe that’s why he didn’t wake me up. Maybe he changed his mind and did regret almost kissing me…again.

  Embarrassment surged through my body but I pushed it away, quickly texting Becca back.

  Sorry, I fell asleep at Dawson’s. Can I still come now?

  I giggled when I read her messages from earlier in the night.

  At 11:07 she texted: I’m on my way home now so u can tell Dawson to drop u off

  Then at 11:50: Where are u

  Then at 12:01: I would bet my left arm that u and Dawson are either out cow tippin or u fell asleep

  Three minutes later: K Case and I have a bet. I think u two fell asleep and she thinks u two are seriously out cow tippin

  Then an hour ago: I win cuz you can’t still be cow tippin. Casey is mad that she lost but I’m going to bed so call if u end up waking up and still need to come here

  I didn’t realize I was laughing until Dawson started to stir beside me. His arm twitched on my stomach and I froze. I kept my face turned down toward my phone, afraid to look over at him. My smile had disappeared, as had my laughter.

  Dawson’s voice was in full-on sleep mode with the roughness of a deep rasp. “You go cow tippin’ one freaking time and no one will let you forget it.”

  I cracked up, shoulders shaking so hard that it caused him to laugh, too.

  I looked over at his droopy eyes and sleepy smile. “That was such a fun night.”

  My cheeks lifted when I thought back to last fall when Dawson and I had skipped out early of the bonfire after a rival football game because Max had dared us to see if cow tippin’ was a real thing. He didn’t believe that cows really slept standing upright.

  Turns out cows do…but they really don’t like it when you tip them over.

  One cow came charging at Dawson, and I, being the person I am, of course got the entire thing on camera. He had to leap over the barbed-wire fence that surrounded the pasture and cut his leg in the process.

  The grassy meadow was right behind our high school, up on a bank that overlooked the town. We weren’t allowed to go up there, according to the principal. He had made a huge announcement one day because apparently some kids had been going up there and making out during school hours.

  But Dawson and I didn’t really care. There weren’t any school faculty members at the rival bonfire; only the football and cheerleading coaches and they were too busy flirting with one another to worry about two high schoolers sneaking away to see if cows really did sleep on their feet.

  Dawson’s laughter broke me out of the memory. “Remember Betsy?”

  I giggled. “Betsy was really freaking fast for a cow.”

  “I almost died.”

  I laughed again, pushing his shoulder. “You’re so dramatic, Dawson.”

  He pulled back, the bed moving under the weight of his body. “Are you kidding? Do I need to pull up the video? I’m almost positive that her eyes were red like she was some demonic cow; she was ticked!”

  I threw my head back and cackled, closing my eyes. I put my hand up on my cheek and then peered up and over at him once again.

  Our laughter quickly died down and then a feeling of dread came over me. The giant elephant in the room was trampling toward us and I wish I could lie and say that I felt totally cool, calm, and collected, but right now, I felt anything but.

  Dawson’s oceanic eyes became darker, his pupils dilating as he stared at my face. He ran a steady hand through his hair and rolled his lower lip between his teeth. My eyes took in every bit of his lips, the way they slightly curve
d inward and the way the lower one was slightly plumper than the top.

  He had to be a good kisser; he had kissed tons of girls and they just kept on coming back, even after he’d all but thrown them away, spewing that he didn’t want a relationship.

  I had to believe he wouldn’t treat me that way, though, or else I was going to be in big, big trouble. What if he didn’t want me as a girlfriend? Maybe he just wanted to kiss me. Or maybe not.

  The low wail of sirens from outside sounded around us, and it was a welcome noise from the silence that had entrenched the room.

  “So, about earlier,” he started, cutting right through the awkwardness.

  My heart pounded viciously in my chest and I couldn’t help but start to feel like my world was about to come crashing down.

  I blurted, “It’s okay, Dawson. You don’t have to pretend like it meant anything. We just—”

  All the words dissipated on my lips when his rough palm rested on my cheek. I drew in a sharp breath as my body jolted backwards from his touch, but at the same time, he lurched forward. We were like magnets; as soon as I’d pull away, he’d come closer, like there was no other way for us to be.

  “Dawson,” I whispered. “You’re,” I gulped, ignoring how amazing his hand felt on my face. “You’re my best friend…”

  He nodded his head slightly and I continued, still whispering. “This will change everything…”

  “I don’t care,” his tone was guttural and it caused something to explode inside me. Instantly, I didn’t care either. All the well-thought out arguments I had made earlier were diminished. Not a single one left in the background to keep me from making things messy or risky. I think, after hearing what he was trying to imply, after feeling his warm breath on my cheek, after waking up and feeling his bare skin on mine…that kissing Dawson was worth the risk.

  He was worth the risk.

  Things were shifting dangerously, but nothing could stop the way my body felt. Nothing could stop the thumping in my chest and the ringing in my ears. Nothing could penetrate what was happening in this moment. Not even the increasingly loud sirens outside his window.

  He leaned in a little closer, dipping his body down to mine, eyeing me, watching to see if I’d pull away—but I didn’t. In fact, I moved closer.

  Our lips were only millimeters apart; I could almost feel the softness of his on mine.

  My heart strummed and my entire body felt electrified, and then his mouth fell onto mine in one swift, perfect moment.

  And everything went calm.

  Dawson’s kiss was dangerous; it shut the entire world out. It was the type of kiss that made you close your eyes even when you begged them to stay open.

  I innocently fell into his body, moving my lips along his like they were meant to do that exact movement for the rest of my life. His tongue moved languidly across mine and if there had been real butterflies in my stomach, they’d be flying so fast that my whole body would probably take flight.

  I let out a sound, one that I’d never even made before, and it quickly brought me back to reality. I was kissing Dawson so thoroughly that I didn’t even realize my phone was vibrating in my lap.

  As soon as he felt the shift in my body, he pulled back, taking his lips off mine. Both of our chests were heaving up and down with such intensity that you’d think we’d just completed a triathlon.

  I etched every inch of his face, wondering if he felt the same way that I did. If he had felt how right and life-altering that kiss just was. As if every single wrong in the world had suddenly been righted.

  By the looks of his face, he had. He had felt it too. His mouth was opened a little and his eyes were widened beyond their normal size. The sharp angles of his cheeks were pinker than before and then he let out a sigh.

  “Wow.”

  The kiss was so powerful that my eyes had glossed over, suddenly blurring the edges around Dawson’s face.

  I was at a loss for words, completely stricken to the point that I didn’t even know where I was. All I knew was that I’d just kissed Dawson and that it was the best kiss I’d ever had.

  I wanted to spend the rest of my life feeling the way I just had with him.

  My forehead scrunched when he tipped his head to my still vibrating phone, and then his attention went to the window.

  The sirens I’d heard earlier seemed close, and they weren’t fading away. They should have moved on by now. They wouldn’t still be that loud.

  Dawson’s brow furrowed because the same thing must have occurred to him.

  I finally glanced down at my phone and picked it up without even seeing who was calling.

  “Hello?”

  Annie, one of the girls I’d run track with, who also lived a block away from me, shouted into the phone. “Finally!! Where the heck are you, Ivy?!”

  “What? Why? I’m at Dawson’s.”

  Her voice was muffled, like she was crying. “Oh my gosh! Thank God! Ivy, you need to get home.”

  A deep chill went down my spine as Dawson’s tall frame pulled away from the bed. He went over to the window and looked through the crystal-clear glass. He turned around, watching for my reaction to the phone call.

  Annie’s voice was troubled with distress. “Your house is on fire. I can see the flames from my bedroom. It looks really bad.”

  And just like that, I bounced to my feet, phone falling to the side. I took off through the bedroom door without even putting my shoes on. Dawson was right behind me, asking what was wrong.

  I didn’t have time to answer. I jumped the stairs, landing with a loud thud, the bottoms of my feet stinging so badly it caused me to pause for a half second.

  I had no idea if Dawson’s parents were home but if they were, I didn’t care. I didn’t care if they thought I was a crazy person running through their house like it was on fire…because mine was.

  I swung open the front door and ran down the street, tiny bits of asphalt and gravel cutting through my socks. They didn’t stop me from running. I could see the orange and red flames from the stop sign at the end of Dawson’s street.

  My feet pulled me through the cool grass of neighboring houses, cool dew soaking my socks. I saw a fence coming up and thankfully, I’d run hurdles in track so I was well-equipped for leaping over stuff.

  As soon as I came to the chain-link fence, I used my hands to help push off the top rail, and catapulted my legs over it. I ran straight through our neighbor’s yard, my foot getting caught in a hole her dog had dug. I hit the ground for a second but Dawson was right beside me, helping me up.

  He kept shouting at me to slow down but I couldn’t. I just kept running.

  Once I was through that yard, I could actually feel the heat of the fire.

  My stomach convulsed as I rounded the last house blocking my view. I moved around the looming firetruck and I was instantly met with thriving, raging flames. They were coming from every single angle of my house.

  Where are my parents?!

  My eyes desperately scanned the surrounding people. I noted the firemen in all their glory, dressed head to toe in suffocating uniforms and as they sprayed my house with giant hoses hooked to their trucks. I searched for an ambulance but I didn’t see one…yet.

  My eyes found my next door neighbors: Judy and Bob St. Clair. I ran over to them, not hearing a thing except my heartbeat pulsing in my ears.

  “Oh, honey,” Judy pleaded. Tears were running down her face with her husband’s arm around her sloped shoulders. “Thank God you’re okay.”

  “Where’s my mom?” I asked, as she enveloped me in a bone-crushing hug. “My dad? Where are they?” I pulled back and her face contorted and my heart fell out from beneath my stomach.

  “Where are they?!” I screamed frantically, as if my life depended on it.

  Dawson’s strong arm wrapped around my torso, pulling me backwards. I knew I was crying by the way my face was wet, but I couldn’t concentrate on that. The only thing I could focus on was the hellish orange hue glea
ming around everyone and everything in front of me.

  Oh my, God. It felt like my heart had died in my chest.

  “Mia!!” I shouted. Dawson was caught off guard at the way my body sharply pushed off his. His arms fell down my torso just enough for me to slip away and run to my house, right toward the blazing fire.

  “Mia!!” I yelled again, my voice so hoarse and jagged that no one would be able to make out what I was saying, even if there hadn’t been a roaring fire surrounding us.

  Someone pulled me back before I even got to my front lawn.

  “Miss, stop! PLEASE, stop!”

  The scratchy material of a fireman’s uniform rubbed my bare arms raw. I clawed and kicked at him only to realize that he wasn’t going to let go and that he was much stronger than me. I didn’t care, though; I continued to fight as raw sobs tore out of my mouth, unable to form any other word but Mia’s name.

  “You need to calm down because I can’t understand you.”

  I shook my head harshly, crying uncontrollably, hair sticking to my wet face.

  “Her sister. She’s asking about her sister.” Dawson came out of nowhere, his voice stern and demanding.

  I snapped my head over to Dawson and the second I met his eyes, I felt myself break in half.

  Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. My sister. Where is my sister? Mia. No, God, please don’t take her.

  “We only found two bodies in the house. No one else.”

  I repeated the sentence in my head, We only found two bodies in the house. Only two bodies.

  Two bodies.

  My parents.

  My body went limp and I stopped struggling. I was still enclosed in the stranger’s grip, his strong arms wrapped around my body so tightly that it was hard to breathe. The flames were dying down a little but it didn’t matter; my entire house was burnt to a crisp. There would be no salvaging anything.

  “Ivy!!” My head whipped over to a barely audible voice but I knew instantly that it was my sister.

  My entire body sagged with relief. Thank you, God.

  I cried harder and the man finally let me go after Dawson looked as if he was going to kill him. I ran past Dawson and opened my arms for my younger sister to burst into them.